For people with dementia, every day is the same. They don’t know what day of the week it is, what month it is, if it’s their birthday or a holiday. There’s a unique peace to not being burdened with the pressures of time passing. Maybe caregivers can learn from this unexpected advantage.
We should make the most of each day – but maybe not too much of it.
We know that milestones are passing, but does it matter? Should we become depressed or stressed out about spending another birthday or holiday alone – or can we learn from those that we are caring for by accepting each moment for what it is – just a moment – for better or worse.
When we moved to Nashville in December of 2013, TK Kimbrell (who manages Glen’s legacy) and his wife Laura invited us to Richland Country Club for New Year’s Eve dinner and dancing. Glen looked great and was able to greet people with a smile and a hand shake, even though he was entering stage six of Alzheimer’s. He simply enjoyed being with his family and friends.
As the night began to wind down, Ashley walked up to her father and escorted him to the dance floor for a father daughter dance. Their sweet dance brought tears to the eyes of everyone watching, but especially for me, because I knew that this dance would likely substitute for the one she might have at her own wedding someday.
When the countdown to New Years began, I held Glen’s hand. When the clock struck 12, we shared a midnight kiss. The kiss was bittersweet for me because I was marking a milestone, trying hard to savor and mark a moment, but Glen was just there – having a wonderful time, meeting new people, sharing a dance and enjoying a kiss while people cheered all around him. He was having a great night. He didn’t feel the same sadness that I did, and I was almost jealous of him in that moment.
The truth is that none of us are promised a tomorrow and every day is a gift from above.
Let’s make the most of every moment – but not too much of it.
An incredibly insightful blog…God gives us blessings in the midst of our pain, if we are open to seeing them. Bless you all!
Happy New Year to you & your family, Kim!
I am glad that you have these special moments with Glen, I also have precious moments with my husband, though unfortunatly, we are living with Lewy Body Dementia, & after be diagnosed 2 & 1/2 yrs ago, my husband just struggles & fights. He does not accept this disease, which, in turn gives me a lot of struggles. It is so difficult bring the care giver of someone with one foot in our world & one foot in the Lewy world. I don’t know what people do that don’t know the Lord as thier personal Saviour! I know that God walks WITH us on this journey, & He gives me His peace as I continue to walk in Faith. May God continue to guide you in your journey. Hugs!
Best to you all it’s been a very active well done journey.You all have played a great part of helping him through his changeling journey.”God Bless,” ” And Peace be with you all.”
Happy New Year to you and Glen and all the family. Everyone who knows me well knows how much I have always loved Glen and his music. His music touched my heart at an early age and he will always be my favorite singer. Thanks for keeping us informed about Glen. I hope and pray that someday there will be a cure!
Happy New Year Kim and Glen. I grew up with Glen as a favorite of mine for years and still is .
I feel so sad because he and you and the rest of the family are going thru this illness.
Myself and my family are going thru Dementia with my mom. She is 86 years old and she is at the point to where she doesn’t know who some people are anymore. It is so sad to watch your loved one slowly die. I try not think of it that way, but I can’t help it. I pray To God a lot to give me and the rest of my family the strength and courage to take care of my Mom the way she needs to be .
I want to Thank you for your web site and the updates on Glen. I miss him and his songs, but I do have his albums. I just need to get a record player to play them now.
Thanks again, stay strong, keep the faith, and keep the courage to continue with what you are doing for your husband and the rest of us.
May God Bless you and Glen and the rest of your family.
Sincerely, ReNee Barthel
Coon Rapids, MN
Well stated. Reminder to stay in joy and in the moment. A great reminder not to lose the moment we are in buried in worry for tomorrow …that we are not guaranteed. Carpe Diem. And Happy New Year!!
I really liked what you had to say. Just finished watching “I’ll Be Me” tonight.
A lovely lesson learned and shared. Thank you. Many blessings today and in the new year.
Debbie
Good advice, Kim. Most people don’t understand that the overwhelming sadness associated with Alzheimer’s and dementia is really not felt by the patient, but by the family. I found some kind of solace in this with my own dad as his Alzheimer’s progressed. It helped me to not be so sad when I understood that he wasn’t, more and more.
God bless you and your family Kim. You are all in my prayers.
I bought tickets to Glenn farewell tour for my dad in Phoenix . I was there with him and my mom and wife . My dad was in advanced stages of Alzheimer’s. He is gone now . He was my best bun , my hunting partner, I worked side by side with him building cabinets and rebuilding antique furniture for over 30 years . That concert was one of the last times I saw my dad be almost him again . He was glued to every song Glenn sang . My dads name to was Glenn . One time when I was 17 I was at the Phoenix Country club installing a bar on the golf course . I was on the flat bed truck pulling out a 2×4 from the slot in the bed of the truck when it dislodge and him me in the mouth and knocked me off the truck on my back on the sidewalk . As I was sitting there a pair of boots were right beside me . I looked up and this tall guy was standing there with a big ol grin and says Son you ok ? Still grinnin … I said ya I’ll be ok and he said alrighty then and walked into the Country club. I didn’t realize who it was in those boots but thought I knew him . A guy walks up to me laughing and says you just smacked yourself in the face in front of Glenn Campbell ! The guy said he was coming in for his hair cut there . I thought wow ! I’ve never been that close to someone famous before . Sorry I rambled but I feel so bad for him and your family to be going thru this . No one deserves this . Alzheimer’s affects everyone involved ………
God bless the campbell family !! WE LOST A FAMILY MEMBER TO ALZ. IN NOV.
Well said Kim. Thinking of you and your family now and in the coming year.
Thinking of you and your family now and in the coming year.
I have been a huge Glen Campbell fan since I heard his first song on the radio. I have always admired his singing and guitar playing, and loved watching his TV show. In the early 1970’s a jug band I was in auditioned to be on a summer replacement for Glen’s show. We weren’t selected but it was fun and exciting to be involved in the process. And the show had a jug band-style song, so maybe we had a little influence.
My mom, an extraordinary person, an intelligent, gifted, kind, loving woman of great faith, lost her earthly life to Alzheimers. My amazing father cared for her for 10 years at home until she went to heaven. Now he is there with her. So I know a bit of what your family is experiencing. May God uphold you with His mighty right hand. Blessings for the New Year.
I just lost my mom to dementia/Alzheimer’s on dec 23rd it’s a heartbreaking disease… I only wish I could somehow make a difference.. I believe a documentary should be made to make people more aware of what to expect. I took care of my mom for 3 years with many struggles for her and I, but that doesn’t mean I loved her any less.. I miss you Mommy and I will everyday for the rest of my life.?❤❤
Thank you for your insight which is most helpful as my Dad has recently been diagnosed. Although it’s bittersweet, I wish you and your lovely family a Happy New Year all the way from Scotland. Xxx
Thank you for your words, I wish I had read them on 12/18, which was my birthday & for the first time my husband didn’t remember my birthday. He has had difficulties with cards for a couple of years but this year my birthday was lost, it wasn’t that he forgot my birthday but that it was the realization that it could be the beginning of him forgetting me. He was diagnosed 2 1/2 years ago & it hasn’t been too bad, the repeatativeness etc., I can handle, but slowly realizing how much I have counted on him to do things that now I have to worry about, like which pieces of equipment uses gas & oil mix of just gas, etc. we have always worked together & have always been together since we were married 26 yrs ago, we still consider ourselves very lucky to be so happy together. I can’t imagine going thru this disease in an unhappy marriage.
I don’t believe I live in denial, but every once in awhile alzheimers smacks me aside of my head & I feel very sad, but feeling sad doesn’t help anything, I will get on taking each day as it comes.
Thank you Kim. Counting everything Joy. I pray yours, GLEN’s and all of the family’s New Year is blessed beyond measure, one moment at a time.
Praying for you, ASHLEY & the entire Glen Campbell Family, Kim. I have been both touched & comforted by your loving post & have made a point to read each & every post written, here, today. May our Lord look out for you all in the New Year of 2017. In Christ’s Love, Gail & Leon Hedrick (my hubby was diagnosed with Alz.’s, three years ago, so reading these posts have special meanings to us both, Kim).
Yes beautiful and insightful words thankyou for sharing